"What's in the box?" ~ Brad Pitt in Se7en
Late last year I saw that Woolgirl was hosting a Seven Deadly Sins yarn club called the Seven Deadly S(p)ins. Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy and Pride? Sign me up. The first shipment was Gluttony, and was kinda twee, but I stayed open minded as I gleefully anticipated what was to come. And then the second shipment, Wrath, arrived Monday. Wrath, people. Gonna be good. I pictured a box full of dark blood red yarn, a copy of Medea, some dark chocolate, maybe a pattern for a voodoo doll and a bottle of arsenic...you get the idea. I might have been slavering on the box as I opened it.
To this:
WTF? My head almost exploded. For some reason we weren't getting Wrath. Oh no. The theme instead was "spun" into its opposite: Peace. What the fuck? I feel so cheated I'm ranting about it three days later like some crazy person on the Hip Knits Ravelry thread.Now, I respect the care that was given to this package, which cost me $39.25 by the way. The bath theme with its sheep washcloth pattern, soap, bath salts and chamomile teabags swag is...nice. The measly 150 yards of blue DK cotton yarn, not so much. The Lily's Sugar n Cream equivalent? Approximately $2. The club runners do address this in their accompanying letter by saying "Please note that this month's shipment is a tad 'light' on yarn, but please no 'wrathful' thoughts about this, as our upcoming shipments will have more than enough yarn to make up for this lighter and more peaceful package." So, they, uh, know they're shorting us? Yup.
More head almost exploding. I had to take two Extra Strength Tylenol and go furiously knit on Flutter. It didn't help, and I actually posted my dismay - like some crazy person - on the Ravelry SDS club board. It didn't help, so here I am ranting to you.
If I wanted fluffy bunnies and sparkly unicorns I would've joined the FBSU yarn club. But I didn't. And I hate to be condescended to/bait and switched; it makes me cranky, and not in the mood to knit a frickin' $40 sheep washcloth or soak in bubbles contemplating world peace. No, instead it makes me want to use my yarn to...make the above mentioned voodoo doll. Hmm, I wonder if there's a pattern on...aah, the Anti Craft. Bad Juju. Lovely.
And, while on the Anti Craft site, I discovered the new issue was up. It's dedicated to bacon. The entire thing. Bacon. The first pattern is even called Bacon of Hate - read about its wonderful raison d'etre here - and is the perfect little receptacle for my wrath. Uh, I mean peace. Lovely. That Zabet, she'd do the Seven Deadlies right.Oh, and if you're wondering, I can hardly wait until I get my Pine Sol and mop duster pattern with accompanying tract on good housecleaning for Sloth.
15 comments:
Do you feel better now?
FWIW, I agree with you 1,000,000%! Wrath indeed. And of course, we all know how much you <3 (heart) blue yarn!
Yeah, they sure did figure out how to stir up the Wrath of Madgik!!
Erg...that kinda really....well, bites. I would definitely be using that blue yarn to knit a voodoo doll with a nice little horn in the middle of it's head. You could even hang a pine air freshener from it if you wanted! Hopefully it'll get better, babe. Until then you can invoke all the wrath you so desire. *hugs*
WTH? I would ask for my money back. Failing that a Bad Juju knitted in peaceful colors with a few pins stuck into it might make you less wrathful. It ought to be one of the deadly sins to send out that crap.
That's a load of crap, and I'm with you on your rant. God, I *love* your rants. Makes me feel like a normal person.
Perhaps by "wrath" they meant "invoking the wrath of knitters who just spent $40 on dime store crap".
Send them a Note (not a note a NOTE tee hee) telling them that you're very unhappy. Maybe quit the club and spend your money on stuff you'll actually want to knit and not burn. Life is too short for crap like this.
So sorry I wasn't there today to hear the rant, I'm sure it was good.
What the???? Why in the hell would they change the whole intention of a club package. It seems so simple. If someone signs up for a club, that club's theme is actually what they want. Hmmm.
Yup. That's it. They wanted to incur the wrath of Madgik! They have succeeded.
I have a slice of needle-felted bacon that my friend Natalie made for me. It goes perfectly with my felted sunny-side-up egg. Regina (Monster Crochet Chick) made a bacon shawl. Everything's better wrapped in bacon! I was thinking of making a bacon scarf! Hmmm? Xmas gift for Madgik?
You know, I've never signed up for any of those clubs because it seems like such a big outlay of money for an uncertain return. And the "extra goodies" like tea, candles, bath salts, etc., that people put in don't do anything for me. I only drink tee when I'm sick, can't burn candles 'cause of the cats, and don't have a bath tub! You get the idea.
I do agree with you, I think in your shoes I'd be feeling quite wrathful!
Wow. I would be soooo furious if I had gotten that package! Talk about false advertisings. Maybe you could make a blue voodoo doll and send her back the mojo.
mmm.. bacon
In my eyes, bacon does subdue sudden wrathful thoughts towards blue cotton yarn and stinky smelly things. Then again I'm a bacon ho :D
I hope you have a great trip!
you got jibbed royally, no doubt. those next packages better be pretty frickin' awesome, is all I can say.
That would totally burn my chaps too! (Okay is that actually an expression or did my mom make that up?)
Enjoy your vacation!
You crack me up. I'm with you -- wrath is definitely not blue washcloths and chamomile tea.
Blimey! Erm, not what I'd have expected either....you do realise that you are now full of 'wrath'. Not sure that was their aim though :(
Sorry you're so disappointed - it is a lot of money to spend and then not be happy. Really sucks! Hope you're feeling less annoyed now :)
DUDE!! That sucks! It's not like you spent just a few bucks and would expect little. For the amount you paid, you should be getting better stuff......not to mention the old bait and switch.
It sounded like a really good club idea....too bad they F-ed it up
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